No one told me that kindergarten and independence go hand-in-hand. I'm just barely accepting the fact that my little man is a kindergartener. But now I gotta face this whole independence issue? Shoot. Me. Now.
So yeah. Last week, we had a pretty late night. I decided to drive Lil T to school the next morning so he could sleep a half hour more. No biggie, right? Here's how the conversation went.
"Why can't I take the bus?"
"Because you're late for the bus. Finish your breakfast and I'll take you to school."
Pause. I can see his little mind working. His eyes move from left to right.
"Okay, but just drop me off in front of the school. I can walk in by myself."
So we get to the school. I get out of the car. "Mom, I can go in by myself. You can go now." Really?!? But I had to go in the school anyways to drop off a check. So I walk in with him. I hear a big sigh. As soon as we get inside, "Okay, bye mom."
Geeeeez. And let me tell you about yesterday.
Lil T has been wanting to buy lunch since the start of school. And lately, he's been doing a lot better with eating his lunch. No more full lunch box returns every day. And besides, "all the kids buy lunch". So yesterday was pizza day. Pizza day is HUGE! That's when EVERYONE buys lunch. In the beginning of the week, I told Lil T I would let him try buying lunch this week. He was very excited. That's all he kept talking about. The night before the big day, I reminded him about it. I said I would go in and have lunch with him. That way I could make sure he was able to get his lunch okay and that he had enough time to eat...since lunch is only 25 minutes long. Besides, the school encourages and welcomes parents to come eat with the kindergarteners. Again, I could see his mind working. Amazing how us moms can see these things. He stops what he's doing. Turns to me and says, "As long as you don't keep saying...keep eating T, keep eating." Oh my gawsh. That had me in stitches. He thinks I'm going to embarrass him. Of course, I had to promise him I wouldn't say it.
So finally the big day comes. I go to the school and Lil T sees me. I wave to him, but at the same time keep my distance so he can do his thing. He walks in to the cafeteria and gets on the lunch line. It's the cutest thing. He's tippy toeing and straining his neck to catch a glimpse of the whole getting lunch process. The line leads into the kitchen area which is completely hidden by a large wall. This is where the lunch server asks them what they want. Then they move down the line with their little tray on that metal bar thingy until they get to the end and come back out. Then they're greeted by the cashier. You can either pay cash or if you have an account set up (which Lil T does), then you just give her your name and you're set. So I'm standing by the cashier, trying to sneak a peek inside to see the whole process. But of course, I can't because of that big darn wall. I do see that he is so small he barely reaches the top of the metal bar thingy as he slides his tray down. Thank goodness one of the teachers is inside with them to help them reach all the stuff. He finally comes out. Lunch tray in hand. And he's beaming. His smile is ear-to-ear and I could tell he was so proud of himself. I was proud of him too! I was soooo tempted to take out my phone and snap a picture so y'all could see this proud moment. But I didn't. 'Cause that would've been WAY too embarrassing.
So I walk with him to a lunch table where we're greeted by his little friends. He sits down and immediately they all get chatty. It's great to see. But of course, being the neurotic mom that I am, I kindly remind him to eat. A slight whisper in his ear. Just one time. He keeps chatting away. Pizza untouched. Ugh, I'm biting my tongue. Restrain mommie, restrain. So I turn away and start chatting with the teachers and lunch ladies. Which by the way, these ladies are wonderful. They make their rounds to each table helping kids open their milk cartons, handing out napkins, even reminding them to eat. Lil T turns to me and says, "you're not staying the whole time, are you?" Sheeeeesh. So much for having lunch with my son. But he's right. He's doing just fine. And I know he's in good hands. So I bend down to say goodbye. He puts his arms out, puckers his lips to kiss me goodbye but at the last second changes his mind and saids, "how about just a hug?" Awwwwww, he's growing up too fast. So I settle for the hug.
I have to say...that was one of those little proud moments that I will never forget. My little man bought his first lunch. Some of you might be thinking yeah, ok so he bought his first lunch. Big deal. Well yes, it is a big deal. A big deal for him and a big deal for me. It's these little moments of transition to independence that I will treasure forever. Not looking forward to them, but nevertheless proud that they happened.
And you'll be happy to know that through this whole experience, I didn't let a tear drop. Oh, there were plenty of opportunities for Niagara Falls. Tears of joy, of course. But not one dropped. And knowing me, that in itself is a HUGE accomplishment. Hey, you know what? I think this whole independence thing is catchy, lol.
As for that last-minute switcharoo from a kiss and a hug to just a hug. I understand. He probably felt a bit embarrassed in front of his friends. He still gives me a kiss and a hug before he gets on the bus so I know it's not because he's outgrown that. Thank goodness. It's okay. It's his first time having me there in front of his new school friends, so I'll give him that. But next time. I'm going in for the big smooch! I mean, c'mon...us moms gotta embarrass our kids. Can't take the fun outta that!!
